Posts Tagged ‘law of attraction’

How often do you run into PPO’s?:
(Behaviours that Peeve People Off!)

Well it’s that time of the year when we’re all in a rush during the Silly Season and for some strange reason our manners seem to go out the window. So courtesy of Sue-Maree from h-spot Pty Ltd who helps people find their h-spot to be happier, healthier and more successful.

I often see people dishing out PPO’s. Sometimes other people are on the receiving end. Sometimes it’s me on the receiving end!

PPO’s create problems between people in just about every workplace and every home every day - creating stress, anxiety, ill-will, distrust, payback, retaliation - ouch!

So in the interests of better relationships - both personal and professional - let’s check out a list of the “Top 10 PPO’s”:

Top 10 PPO’s Behaviours that “Peeve People Off”!

At number 10:Taking priority over others.

No discussion, no agreement… people taking priority over others just because they want it, and can get away with it!

Number 9: Making assumptions about others.

People making assumptions based on limited (and often selective) information. Just as others don’t know the totality of what’s really going on with us, we don’t know the totality of what’s really going on with others!

Number 8: Jumping to conclusions about others.
Ditto. What applies to making assumptions also applies to jumping to conclusions. People jumping to conclusions based on limited (and often selective) information. Just as others don’t know the totality of what’s really going on with us, we don’t know the totality of what’s really going on with others!

Number 7: Forcing responsibilities on others.
No discussion, no agreement. People using whatever level of manipulation/deception/coercion/force it takes to get others to do what they want!

Number 6: Taking responsibilities from others
Again, no discussion, no agreement. People using whatever level of manipulation/deception/coercion/force it takes to “take over” others rightful responsibilities - with or without their knowledge.

Number 5: Setting limits and dictating rules… and imposing them on others.
No discussion and no agreement. People setting limits and dictating rules that work for them, then using whatever power they have to impose them on others.

Number 4: Making decisions… and imposing them on others.
Again, no discussion and no agreement. People making decisions based on what they think is “best” or “right” then using whatever power they have to force them on others.

Number 3: Demanding compliance and obedience from others.
People demanding others do what they want / need / think is “right”. As if their way is the right way, and other people’s wants and needs are less important than theirs. Again, no discussion and no agreement.

Number 2: Manipulating behaviour with rewards and/or punishments.

People rewarding and punishing others using whatever power they have to bestow or withhold based on their judgement of how well other people “measure up” to what they think is “right” or “acceptable”.

At Number 1 on our list of Top 10 PPO’s (drumroll please!) basically, what most PPO’s boil down to:
Number 1: Abuse of Power.

People using “power plays” to manipulate/deceive/coerce/force others to do what they want - at others expense!

“Hey! What’s going on??!!” It’s easy to see how behaviours like these PPO!
(”peeve” being a gross understatement in many situations!).

Your Champion Action Today:
3 questions to improve your communication skills (and your relationships!):
1. When (if ever) am I on the receiving end of PPO behaviours?
2. What do I typically do when I’m on the receiving end?
3. When (if ever) am I dishing out PPO behaviours? (Even without realizing it?)
Now here’s some ideas on how to respond…

CCC’s for PPO’s: Cool, Calm, Collected responses to behaviours that Peeve People Off!

Common defensive reactions to PPO’s result from taking it personally, and striking out (by attacking others) or sucking it up (as a way to protect ourselves).

Before we go getting hot under the collar about what people seem to be doing and use either of these strategies, here’s a suggestion:

Check It Out That means turning our attention to whatever it is people seem to be doing, and check it out. We do it by reflecting back to people what we think is happening - as a QUESTION (not an accusation!). For example;

Are you making assumptions about me/them?
You’re jumping to conclusions about me/them?
Are you trying to force your responsibilities on me/them?
You’re trying to manipulate me/them with rewards and punishments?

Get the idea?

If people claim not to be doing it, we can simply respond; No? Ok then. (and move on)

Whatever’s happening, to check it out is a simple 2-step process;
Use a question frame, for example;

**Are you …
**Are you trying to …
**You’re …
**You’re trying to …

Add whatever it is people seem to be doing;

…taking priority over me/them?
…making assumptions about me/them?
…jumping to conclusions about me/them?
…forcing your responsibilities on me/them?
…taking responsibilities from me/them?
…setting limits and dictating rules & imposing them on me/them?
…making decisions & imposing them on me/them?
…demanding compliance and obedience from me/them?
…manipulating my/their behaviour with rewards/punishments?
…abusing your power to get me/them to do what you want?

If people aren’t doing what you think they’re doing - it’s a good thing to have cleared the air … to have set the record straight.

If people are doing what you think they’re doing, this simple technique is often enough to stop the behaviour in it’s tracks. And if it doesn’t … there’s more about it in the book.

If you’d like to understand more about what’s going on in these situations, and what you can do to handle situations like these without striking out, or sucking it up. If you’d like to handle even the most difficult situations with respect for yourself and others - with class and style you can be proud of (and other people will admire) - it’s absolutely doable, in fact it’s easy… when you have the right skills.

In fact if you want to learn why people use PPO’s, how to communicate without using PPO’s, and how to deal with it when other people are using PPO’s on you! In short, “what hurts” and “what works” in communication…then email the Champion Mindset office@championmindset.com.au for your copy of “What’s Going On? An Exploration of Communication - What Hurts & What Works” complimentary copy by Sue-Maree.

and remember: if you don’t quit, you will make it.
Cheers Shelley Taylor-Smith

Fitness Expert, Rob Poulos wrote a great article which ties in perfectly with Thinking Like A Champion and adopting the lifestyle changes…I think you will like it….enjoy!

A Simple Change In Mindset Will Burn More Fat Fast

Most people that I talk to about health and fitness talk about “getting in shape”. But I don’t think they realize that their words are actually counterproductive to their aspirations of burning fat. You hear a lot of people lamenting about being out of shape and saying, “I need to get in shape and burn fat”, or, “I want to get in shape and burn fat.” What you don’t hear them saying is, “I want to get in shape, burn fat, and stay that way.”

They may want to stay in shape, but their mindset is focused on getting in shape. This makes you more susceptible to the fad diets and latest exercise gimmick on the market. You’re so focused on getting in shape that you’ll try almost anything regardless of how silly or difficult to follow it might seem, because you’re entirely focused on the short term goal.

A simple change in the “quick fix” mindset to one of long term success will steer you down the correct path. You’ll be less enticed by the late night TV hype, and more focused on doing the right things most of the time. Wouldn’t you agree that life long health and fitness is what’s most important?

Of course creating an environment in your body that allows you to burn fat fast is essential to this goal. A person who is in shape in their 50s and 60s is a lot more impressive to me than someone who is lean and fit in their 20s and 30s. That’s because the dedication to maintaining the proper exercise plan and a sensible nutrition strategy for the rest of your life is rare to find. It’s a rare mindset.

If you really want to transform your physique and your health for good, you must make it a lifestyle, a habit. And that starts in your mind. That’s what the people who are lean for life do. In fact, if I think about all of the people I personally know that are in great shape and have been for a while, I start to understand that they have their minds on staying in shape.


They think about it day and night, not obsessively, but with each thing they do…they subconsciously think, “Is this going to positively or negatively impact my long term health and fitness?”, “Am I doing everything I reasonable can to burn fat and live a healthy lifestyle?”.

The good news is that research shows you can develop simple habits like those involved in eating and exercising properly in under a month…sometimes even sooner. And with the type of exercise and diet tips I recommend to my students, you don’t need to give up your life’s pursuits so that you are working out every day, nor do you need to follow a wacky diet you can’t reasonably make a lifestyle out of.

And after a few months of practicing these methods, I’ve found that your body will start telling you it wants to keep exercising and eating right…you just won’t feel right with out it. Why? Because your body naturally wants to be healthy and lean.

So I urge you to forgo the “get in shape” mindset, and instead embrace the idea of staying in shape and creating that fat burning furnace that is so essential to life long health and fitness.

Imagine yourself in the body of your dreams, today, tomorrow, and 5, 10, 20 or more years from now. What will you be doing then, in your lean, strong, and healthy body? Chances are, you won’t be trying to “get in shape”. Instead, you’ll be burning fat 24/7, and enjoying life as you should…full of vitality and passion.

And remember: it is mind-over-matter
and if you don’t quit…you will make it!

Cheers Shelley Taylor-Smith

PS: Need help deciding how to change your mindset to STAY IN SHAPE in 2010 and beyond and realising that with so much to do and only 24hrs a day to do it? Call Champion Mindset office on 1300 78 41 70 and ask to Pick Shelley’s Brain for 10mins for FR.eE!

You CAN Always Get What You Want

As the temperature hit 39degrees Celcius last Saturday, it was hotting up even more at the Esther Foundation 2009 graduation. As I sat with Justin Langer and his family (Aussie Cricket legend and a Champion bloke) we were both amazed how the five young Australian women graduating had overcome insurmountable odds including alcoholism, domestic violence, drug addiction, depression, anger management, self mutilation, and eating disorders. And WOW now they’re standing VICTORIOUS!!! Justin and I were both exhilarated and shed many tears (of joy!).

So as I sat alongisde Justin Langer I remembered talking to a good friend of mine, who was a nationally known sportsman, reaching the pinnacle of his sport, then going on to other successes in other fields. He told me that when he was young, he always knew he was going to be a Wallaby. He had the talent, that’s for sure, but what he also had was the belief. Belief in himself, in his dream and in his goals.

I’ve spent quite a bit of time around eminently successful people and the one thing they all have in common is that same overwhelming sense of belief. They know what they want and they also know with unswerving belief that they can do it. Of course, this is not to say they don’t have setbacks. It’s not always smooth sailing, but their fundamental belief in the goal and themselves pulls them through the rough spots. Keeping their eye on the prize, sometimes to the exclusion of all else, is what ensures their success.

Naturally, we can’t all be Wallabies or Aussie Swim Team Dolphins, but we can all achieve our goals as long as certain conditions are met. They must be realistic, we must really want them, they must be beneficial and the most important condition of all, we must have a goal in the first place.

So many of us are vague about what we want and what we expect from our lives. We spend a lot of time wishing things were better, but not a lot of time actually making them so. We think we do, but often we’re really just coasting along not really expending any effort and sort of doing OK but there’s something slightly unfulfilling about just getting by.

Setting goals is one of the very best things we can do for ourselves
. Deciding what we really want and working towards it has to be infinitely better than drifting aimlessly hoping to avert disaster.

Our minds have a remarkably powerful facility that many of us under-utilise. If we tell it where we want to go, it will map ways for us to get there. I call it your automatic GPS – Goal Projection Success Mindset machine. If we keep the object of our desire in the forefront of our mind, if we see an image of it every day, even subliminally, our GPS mindset machine does the hard work for us.

But we need to be careful with all that power, because it can work just as well in the negative as in the positive. If I keep thinking, “I’m working too hard. I need a break,” my mind will find a way to fulfil my goal. Unfortunately, that could mean I get sick or get injured or all the work that seems to just flow in suddenly dries up. If instead I think, “It’s time I was rewarded for all this hard work,” my outcome is far more likely to be positive, because my mind will be creating ways to reward me.

It’s not enough to set one goal and go for it. Your fitness goals should be full of some for tomorrow, some for next month and some for five years from now. Once we look like we’re going to reach one of our goals, re-evaluate and move the goal post if necessary. Why not shoot for the moon?

Earl Nightingale said, “We become what we think about most”. If we’re always thinking that life is tough, it will become so. If we think that we’re not quite good enough, guess what?! It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

It’s just as easy to hold a positive thought as a negative one, so perhaps it’s time for you to get positive about where you are and where you’re going and set a few goals.

Naturally, if you need a little help figuring out how to plan for 2010, find a goals coach that will help you find the right direction.

Remember: if you don’t quit…you will make it!
Cheers Shelley Taylor-Smith

Day 28: Gratitude, 50-Day Challenge
Thursday, December 10th, 2009

Martin Luther King Jr, Civil Rights Leader said it best: “Life’s most persistent and urgent question is: What are you doing for others?”

It is paradoxical but profoundly true that the most certain way for people to bring hope, help, meaning and joy to their own lives is by reaching out and bringing hope, help, meaning and joy to the lives of others. If you’ve already experienced this beautiful phenomenon for yourself, you are in good company.

Today’s challenge is brought to us via the selfgrowth.com article: Giving Back to the World - By Jeremy Gislason

Are you grateful for everything you have?

Consider this, whether you have a million dollars in the bank or a hundred — if you have a roof over your head, food on your table and the comfort of friends and family, you’re rich.

Millions around the world live a bare bones existence and the pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness takes a backseat to survival. If you have a roof over your head, you have food in your stomach, and you probably have at least one car, a bank account, and an abundance of creature comforts then by global standards, you’re rich.

Take a minute to look around you, wherever you are. It doesn’t matter if you’re reading this from the comfort of your couch, if you’re sitting at a table in a coffee shop, if you’re sitting in your car, on your treadmill or exercise bike, or if you’re enjoying the sunshine and reading this outside. Take a look around you and make a mental note of all you have. We’re not just talking about the material items either. Friends, family, mentors, and pets are all blessings.

What about you? You have a wealth of strengths, skills, knowledge, and experience too.

What Are You Doing With All Of Your Wealth?

Gratitude has the power to bring more abundance into our lives. We know this to be true and by simply expressing gratitude daily, in every moment of your life, you will understand it to be true too.

In addition to attracting more of what we’re grateful for, like wealth, love, and good health, gratitude also invites compassion into our lives. There are so many people in this world who suffer, who struggle and who do not have the wealth and abundance you have right now, today. It’s important to point out that this is an opportunity for you.

Giving back benefits you in a number of ways.
>> When you give back, you feel better about yourself, your accomplishments and your wealth — you feel grateful.
>> When you give back, you learn about yourself and about others — this is a valuable opportunity.
>> When you give back, you make valuable connections with people who have the power to change your life in any number of amazing ways.
>> When you give back, you gain both spiritually and monetarily. It’s the Law of Attraction — which states you attract what you focus on. The Law of Attraction says: That which is like unto itself, is drawn.

When you possess gratitude, compassion, and generosity of mind, money and spirit, you attract those things back to you — all which make you richer, smarter, and surrounded by life, love and happiness.

Consider for just a moment the amazing contributions of:
** Bill Gates and his foundation which partners with companies around the world to improve health and education.
** Oprah Winfrey and her angel network which works on global and local networks to improve the lives of others.
** And Kelly a small business owner who regularly motivates her social networking followers to generate thousands of dollars to families in need by donating her time and services in exchange for monetary donations from others.

YOU
, no matter what level you’re at or what goals you are striving for, have the mind-blowing opportunity to improve the lives of others, including your own, in a number of ways.

1. You have the power to change the world, to better the world.
2. By embracing and acting on your power, you will gain abundance both materially and spiritually.

“We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.”
-Winston Churchill


How Can You Give Back?

There are a number of ways you can give back to the world.

1.) Volunteer

Volunteer your time, skills and expertise. Volunteering offers a number of benefits:

-You Become Part of a Community

Volunteering has a meaningful, positive impact on your community. We depend on each other for personal and professional survival and when you’re part of a community, your personal and your professional life prosper. Volunteering helps, you build and sustain your community, which in turn will give back to you. It’s a win-win situation.

-Broaden Your Repertoire

People volunteer to contribute their skills and knowledge however it’s practically guaranteed that you’ll walk away with more knowledge and skills than you had beforehand. Volunteering is the perfect vehicle to discover something you are good at and develop a new skill.

-A Sense of Accomplishment

There’s little else in life that offers the same level of satisfaction like watching your hard earned efforts benefit someone in need.

Volunteering also offers you new interests, new experiences, new people, and authenticity and credibility in your industry.

2.) Donate funds
What’s your favorite cause or charity - something that’s important to you, your family or your friends? Perhaps it is the American Cancer Society, the Humane Society, or the Nature Conservancy. These organizations thrive on two things: Volunteers and Donations.

If you have causes, passions and charities which are near and dear to your heart, it’s important to do what you can to keep them in the black, financially solvent, and able to continue to provide their services.

3.) Use your business to tap into the needs of your prospects, community, customers, and associates

One of the truly wonderful aspects about being a business owner is the amazing power you have to give back. As a business owner, you have a rolodex jam-packed with contacts. This includes your lead list but it also includes your associates, vendors, partners, and always your friends, family and community members. You are a veritable Paul Revere — and one word from you has tremendous power, power to change the world and have a positive effect on the lives of others.

4.) Mentor

Mentoring is an exceptional way to share your knowledge and experience with others and give back to the world.

Mentoring is when you meet with someone one-on-one and help them learn and grow. A mentee can be a child or young adult struggling with choices, a professional who is interested in growing their career, or a person interested in starting a business similar to yours. A mentor/mentee relationship is essentially, however you define it.

Your Champion Action Today

If history and experience have taught us anything it’s that the more you give, the more you receive. When you take the time to give back to the world with the intention of improving the lives of others, the essential result is that you end up receiving so much more than you can possibly imagine. Give it a try. You’ll be amazed what happens in your life.

Many thanks again for this article from selfgrowth.com for this article titled: Giving Back to the World - By Jeremy Gislason


And remember: if you don’t quit, you will make it!

Cheers Shelley Taylor-Smith

Do you really know the secret?
Thursday, February 12th, 2009

The Secret created a great deal of publicity for the DVD “The Secret” and more generally “The Law of Attraction” is all over the internet at the moment.

It seems people are waking up to the fact that, what you focus on, you tend to create in your life. Speaking to you as someone who understands the power of taking control of your life, I’d reinforce this message wholeheartedly.

You really have the power to create almost anything you truly want in your life and are creating your experience of life with your thoughts every moment of every day.

However, my experiences speaking to people since the hype over the last couple of years have led me to believe that many people are missing a crucial detail.

The pace of life is speeding up and we live in a world where people increasingly want to make things easier and quicker and that includes me. My coaching philosophy is about helping people make the changes in their life they’ve been procrastinating on for years, and I believe the easier we can make those changes the better.

However, in listening to “The Secret” etc. many people seem to have decided that all you have to do is “ask” and the universe will provide for you, “Your wish is my command” as they say in the film.

The truth is there really is more to it than that, you have a big part to play too, and by part to play I mean action to take. Many people seem to have missed this part in the film.

Taking charge of your thoughts and visualising what you want will transform what appears in your life and then you have to take action when the opportunities arise.

The first steps of the process help you clarify what you want, get you on the path to believing you can have it and then sensitises your unconscious filters to the opportunities that are all around you all of the time. Then it’s your turn, when an opportunity arises, you have to take action.

If you want to use the metaphor of the “universe providing” then you could see taking action as your part of the bargain. Taking action and being willing to learn from the feedback is a crucial element of personal empowerment.

Too many people these days are waiting for the time to be perfect, or for other people to act so they can act. By developing the habit of being proactive, taking action and learning from the result, people can break out of their old fears and realise much more of their Champion potential.

So maybe the next time you find yourself thinking, I’ll do that when…, or I wish they’d do … then I could… etc. Maybe you could just ask: “What can I do right now to move this forward?”

It could be as simple as making the phone call! But do it!
Whatever it is do it and begin to break those old reactive patterns today!

Accepting that in taking action you will get a result, and you can learn and develop from that result, be it the result you wanted or not.

As you begin to take more action, I’ll think you’ll find as many people throughout history have found before you, that life tends to reward action.

It’s no secret that action combined with reflection and learning from the result leads to every success in life, from a baby learning to walk, to the first steps on the moon. All success is built on this simple principle.

Think about these examples that will help you attract what you want …remembering we attract what we are in order to create what we want:

What’s really important to me today?
and what am I willing do about it?

Or maybe a better question is, What action will you take today?
Whatever it is, if you were to do it today, what could you learn?

And remember to have some fun today too.

Go for Gold!
Cheers Shelley